MANUP—Secure Your Sons in 2020
Boys are tough to raise. Handling and helping them develop a great sense of manhood necessitates both tough and tender love from the onset. Over the years, several single mothers told me that although they have a great love for their sons, it becomes difficult for them to understand and adequately meet their emotional needs, especially when they reach their late teens. God in His wisdom set up an extraordinary family structure, where both the man and the woman should raise the children together in an intact and intimate environment. Today I am suggesting some areas where men may secure their sons. I will examine girls next time.
Having respect for their mother.
The father who places a high value on his son’s mother is giving that child a superb gift. By consistently respecting his son’s mother, a father is laying an excellent foundation for the growing son to view and treat women with dignity and not as objects to abuse and then discarded like trash. When the son sees his father treat his mother with love and respect, the chances of his doing the same to women are very great. The opposite is also true.
Spending quality time with them.
Children spell love –T I M E. Devoting quality time must become a top priority, especially within the son’s formative years. Usually, during the first 5 to 7 years, we often lay emotional and other cornerstones that frequently determine the life structures the son may plan for his future. Whereas the mother carries the son for about 9 months and experiences the growth and movements and after birth connects with the son through breastfeeding and other forms of touch, the father also needs to bond with his son. Caring for, talking, smiling, and playing with, cuddling, and feeding are all positive actions that foster effective bonding with the male child.
Playing with them.
Although I knew that my dad loved me, he did not play much with me. I was different. I found that pleasurably throwing my sons in the air and catching them; playfully wrestling with them; pillow “fighting”; purposefully having them ride on my back on land and in the sea, sometimes much to the horror of my wife, brought much laughter and joy to them in their early growing-up years and created a healthy bond between us. Play helps the son to develop a healthy, competitive spirit and fairness in dealing with others.
Showing practical leadership.
Some fathers never saw genuine leadership modeled within his home, and it becomes a tough challenge for them to exhibit that necessary quality. Bonding with successful fathers or seeking help from organisations like PAREDOS may assist with that deficit. Fathers should show a consistent and determined example of honest work, where financial support for the home is guaranteed. Chores, when properly done, will not only give the boys a sense of responsibility but also help them appreciate the importance of team work.
Celebrate and affirming them.
A dad will take the occasion to celebrate special occasions with their sons: their birthdays, graduations, award ceremonies, sporting, and other activities. Sons feel special when their dads are celebrating with them. Like celebration, giving expressions of affirmation also boosts the son’s esteem level and lends itself for him to become a more secure and confident individual.
Teach them Godly principles.
I believe that every father needs to know that his child is a gift from God, and therefore deliberately guiding him by godly principles like honesty, and integrity should never be compromised. All sons need to know that they are not designed by chance, but fearfully and wonderfully made by a wise and loving Creator who has a defined purpose for their lives. When sons acknowledge God in all their ways, excellent peace and a great sense of destiny will grip them.
Can you imagine what may happen if fathers secure their sons in 2020.
Having respect for their mother.
The father who places a high value on his son’s mother is giving that child a superb gift. By consistently respecting his son’s mother, a father is laying an excellent foundation for the growing son to view and treat women with dignity and not as objects to abuse and then discarded like trash. When the son sees his father treat his mother with love and respect, the chances of his doing the same to women are very great. The opposite is also true.
Spending quality time with them.
Children spell love –T I M E. Devoting quality time must become a top priority, especially within the son’s formative years. Usually, during the first 5 to 7 years, we often lay emotional and other cornerstones that frequently determine the life structures the son may plan for his future. Whereas the mother carries the son for about 9 months and experiences the growth and movements and after birth connects with the son through breastfeeding and other forms of touch, the father also needs to bond with his son. Caring for, talking, smiling, and playing with, cuddling, and feeding are all positive actions that foster effective bonding with the male child.
Playing with them.
Although I knew that my dad loved me, he did not play much with me. I was different. I found that pleasurably throwing my sons in the air and catching them; playfully wrestling with them; pillow “fighting”; purposefully having them ride on my back on land and in the sea, sometimes much to the horror of my wife, brought much laughter and joy to them in their early growing-up years and created a healthy bond between us. Play helps the son to develop a healthy, competitive spirit and fairness in dealing with others.
Showing practical leadership.
Some fathers never saw genuine leadership modeled within his home, and it becomes a tough challenge for them to exhibit that necessary quality. Bonding with successful fathers or seeking help from organisations like PAREDOS may assist with that deficit. Fathers should show a consistent and determined example of honest work, where financial support for the home is guaranteed. Chores, when properly done, will not only give the boys a sense of responsibility but also help them appreciate the importance of team work.
Celebrate and affirming them.
A dad will take the occasion to celebrate special occasions with their sons: their birthdays, graduations, award ceremonies, sporting, and other activities. Sons feel special when their dads are celebrating with them. Like celebration, giving expressions of affirmation also boosts the son’s esteem level and lends itself for him to become a more secure and confident individual.
Teach them Godly principles.
I believe that every father needs to know that his child is a gift from God, and therefore deliberately guiding him by godly principles like honesty, and integrity should never be compromised. All sons need to know that they are not designed by chance, but fearfully and wonderfully made by a wise and loving Creator who has a defined purpose for their lives. When sons acknowledge God in all their ways, excellent peace and a great sense of destiny will grip them.
Can you imagine what may happen if fathers secure their sons in 2020.